Manuel es muerto
MOTHERSHIP: Shauna. Are you sitting down? I have some terrible news. SHAUNA: Oh god. What happened? M: I've had a car accident. S: Oh my god! M: I slammed into a semi-trailer. S: Oh my god! Are...
View ArticleThe Way Young Lovers Do
Public transport is a cruel and evil form of mobile hell, in which one is forced to be surrounded by people at the very time of day when one least wants to be surrounded by people. Yesterday the girl...
View ArticleThe Road to Red Square
On 19 June we were on the bus for a good seven hours, making our way from Novgorod to Moscow. When I wasn’t scoffing Finnish chocolate I was pressed up against the window trying to take photos of...
View ArticleThe System
There were three girls on the train trying to establish who among them had the shittiest job. Was it the sales assistant, the coffee shop girl or the Pizza Hut chick? While they were all equally...
View ArticleMidnight Express
The Edinburgh Festivals are quite a different experience now that I'm not living in the middle of Edinburgh. It used to be a short bus ride or walk home after an evening show. But these days if we miss...
View ArticleThe Magic Hoodies
I have this hoodie. It is navy blue, old and grotty. I bought it for ten pounds back in 2004. That was the Year of Voluntary Poverty, when Rhiannon and I worked seven days a week and ate Tesco Value...
View ArticleAmbition
There is a train conductor with a secret longing to be a Voiceover Guy. This my theory anyway. The man really has the golden tonsils. I’ll be sitting there, seething into my book and loathing humanity;...
View ArticleTorn Between Two Lovers
After nearly 4.5 years in Scotland I've finally exchanged my Australian drivers licence for a UK one. You're supposed to do this after 12 months of residency, but strangely I couldn't bear to part with...
View ArticleOn the X26 to Glasgow
Drunk guy just sat down next to a bookreading girl on the bus. BOOK GIRL: You are reeking of drink! DRUNK GUY: And you are reeking of literature! (this is just a wee tweet I wanted to preserve!)
View ArticleCrash Course
Thank you, all you wacky people, for your interesting suggestions for new car names. After lengthy deliberation, we have christened our little red beast. THE WINNER: Manuel (suggested by Simon) RUNNER...
View ArticleYou’ve Sure Got A Thirst
There’d been a little rattle in Manuel for a week or so now. Nothing too bad we thought, but we booked it in for a service today. But last night on my way to singing class, I had a little adventure....
View ArticlePlease share my umbrella
It’s twenty minutes to half an hour to work on the bus each morning, depending on the Moron to Bus Stop ratio. There’s always someone who has to argue with the driver, lose their bus pass, not have the...
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